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| I probably won't get Christmas cards out this year, so here's my year-end report:
2008 is coming to an end
And so, this quick poem I'll send
To give you the details would take too much time
And besides, I'm not that good with rhyme.
So much has happened, where do I begin
I guess from the start I'll dig right in.
In January I moved, in March I quit,
But then I found a pretty good fit.
From kindergarten to pre-school I went--
Lots of emotional energy spent.
But the change was good, I found my groove
Only to decide on another move.
Working with youth may be the right thing,
But conflict with church dynamics can cause a sting.
It's hard to wish I could do so much more,
To feel like there's something else I'm good for.
In the midst of all this change and strife
I attended a conference that influenced my life.
Human Trafficking became a hot topic
To represent Lutheran women I got picked.
Besides all that, I became Sister Michelle,
Just one more interesting story to tell.
And now, as I look at 2009
I'm hoping that things will turn out fine.
I'll move at least once, maybe twice
I sure hope it's not more than thrice.
I'll finish up school, at least for a while,
I'll spend some time learning about my personality style.
So here's to a year that needs to be done
Overall, it just was not too much fun.
I had some laughs and lots of tears,
I learned a lot about my fears.
But God is good, that much is true,
So Merry Christmas and God's blessings to you.
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| I went to bed with homework on the couch and woke up with homework in my head. At church I had a brilliant lesson planned, but the kids stayed home or went somewhere else instead. I forgot to make an announcement and had to tell someone I can't help. And when I told a kid I was quitting two other kids came up to tell me about a loose tooth and give me a hug. At Communion my candle wouldn't light and the pastor waited to serve everyone until it did. How was I supposed to know I was supposed to take Communion AND THEN light the candle. I think I'll move to Australia.
After church I went to the other church, where I wasn't prepared but the kids showed up. I tried to lead some worship but all it was was a pathetic attempt at a solo, with "are we just going to sing the whole time" as the applause. Are they hiring youth directors in Australia?
The cup of coffee by the river was decent, and the paycheck in my box was acceptable. The clear blue sky helped, and the brisk fall air did its part. But going to a third church and not being noticed or welcomed didn't help, nor did the documentary based in Tanzania. The songs were new and the guitar was too loud, and the piles of unpacked food in the lobby reminded me of the job I desperately wanted but didn't get. After doing dishes, laundry and homework, and watching more 'House' than is healthy, all in all I think it was just one of those days... maybe even in Australia. | | |
| I updated the internet system on my laptop and in the process xanga has been blocked, so I haven't been able to post anything in a while. For the most part that hasn't been an issue, because 1)I figure no one reads this anyway so no one even notices and 2)my sanity has been on the verge of totally combusting so many times in the recent months that to form a coherent sentence of reflection has been out of the question.
But, I saw a link to my blog on a friend's blog, and decided to click in and see how I was doing. Sure enough...I'm here! So now I don't know where to start catching up with myself about what's been going on.
Here's an interesting story: I am now teaching Sunday school at an Ethiopian congregation on Sunday afternoons. Last week (or was it the week before?) we were talking about prayer, and came across a verse that said that Jesus went off to pray. One of the kids asked, "who did Jesus pray to, because isn't he, like, God?" As we talked about this, we came to the conclusion that Jesus talked to himself...in a sense. And I got this really funny image in my mind of Jesus standing over a sink with a razor in his hand, looking into the mirror and seeing a reflection of a scruby face, unkempt hair, and that "I just got out of bed and haven't had coffee so don't talk to me' look in his eyes. I imagine him saying something like, "Here's to another day at the office." Somehow it made Jesus' humanity a bit more accessible :). I went to my Lutheran Confirmation class on Wednesday where we were also talking about prayer, and I brought up the story. I was quickly corrected in my theological conclusions by another adult leader. But I maintain that's it's a clever conclusion to draw. Perhaps not entirely theologically correct, but clever.
Since my last post, which had to do with taking care of the nephew while the sister-in-law was in training, I have come to realize some major things about myself:
--I do not really enjoy supervising 4-yr. olds for 8 hrs/day
--I will take the blame before causing conflict
--I have more opinions than I probably should about how a congregation could do ministry with youth
--I need to get away from Minneapolis for a period
--I lack some fairly strategic organization skills
--I like to do puzzles and color, but teaching a kid how to write 'f' is not fun for me
--I know way too many children's songs
One day I want to meet someone, and then meet them again 2 years later, and when they ask, "so how's it going?" I really want to be able to say, "not much has changed...I'm just doing the same stuff." But this is not that day. And I'm entering into ANOTHER period of change and transition. I just officially resigned from my Lutheran youth director position. that's a long story. Next month I'll be telling my landlord I don't wish to renew the lease. I'm once again browsing employment pages for possibilities... I'm down to my last 4 classes of the current degree, while the application packet for the next one is on the bookshelf. Yeah, this is not the day when I can answer "same old, same old." | | |
| Here's some snippets of my life at the moment:
I recently began my 3-week stint as primary care-giver of my nephew while his mother is in training at Fort McCoy. So I figured this is the sort of thing that should be recorded, and may be amusing to those who find such things amusing. The victories of today were these: no tears during morning getting dressed routine; he put my phone back on my bedside table when it was time to leave (instead of throwing it on the floor); no tears during bath time tonight; spontaneous hug while getting pj's on, smooth bed-time transition. Yay!
Besides doing the mother-type thing, my other beef at the moment is that I'm taking a computer information systems class online, and I'm annoyed that I have to have Windows XP. I'm fairly fluent in Windows 2003, or whatever it is that I have, and I don't really feel the need to upgrade to XP until it's time to buy a new computer and XP will be the default system on there. And I could figure out how to do the assignments in Word 2003. But if I don't submit them in a .docx file, the professor will mark me off. I should have just tested out of it altogether!
The other thing that's annoying about Rasmussen's online classes is that you have to post a response to the discussion question before Wednesday, and then you have to respond to someone else's post by Sunday night. This is fine. But the response to the classmate's post has to be AFTER Wednesday. What I'd like to do is sit down on Tuesday night (like tonight) and post my initial post as well as respond to a classmate's post. But I STILL have to sign in after Wednesday and respond to a post, otherwise I won't get full discussion points. This is silly to me, because if I was going to class I would enter into the discussion in that one classroom on that one night and get discussion points. But in an online class the discussion has to take all week. This really annoys me.
On a positive note, I've started playing volleyball in an effort to 'find me a life,' and am greatly enjoying it. Haven't met any new friends through the process, but people are beginning to look familiar and even remember that they've met me before. There's always that tension between playing 'for fun' and playing 'competitively' when it comes to sports, and usually I'm in the 'for fun' category. But, admittedly, when a group of people plays against each other who actually know how to play and are fairly decent at playing, it really is more fun.
Interesting note: I received admissions materials from Princeton Theological Seminary. Applying for the 2010-2011 year is one of many doors I'm knocking on at the moment.
I have a whole list of things I've been meaning to blog about, but it has been somehow misplaced in the clutter of the brain storage system.
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| My preschoolers 'graduated' today, and although I've only been their
teacher for 2 months, they made me proud! I have been given the
responsibility of this group of 10 4-5 yr. olds who most days drive me
crazy. But in the midst of the craziness, they're crawling into
my heart. I've seen them grow in the few weeks I've been with
them. I've seen them use their words instead of their
fists. I've seen them help each other out when something's
wrong. I've seen them challenge each other to follow the rules
and cooperate. I've seen them solve problems together. But
like I said--they drive me crazy sometimes. They sing pieces of
music from 'Alvin and the Chipmunks' until I get the dumb songs stuck
in MY head. They push and shove and wrestle every chance they
get. They get stuck in their anger and frustration and I can't
help them out.
But for all the craziness, those kids make me proud. This week
our theme was 'x-tra special me,' so instead of planning extra
activities I allowed them 'creative invention time,' where they could
use whatever they could find on the shelf to make whatever they
wanted. Today I put up a little stage (two rows of blocks they
could stand on) and made a sign announcing "Invention Station." I
made up a little diddy and we put on a show. Each kid stood
proudly on the stage, introduced himself (most of them are boys), and
presented his invention. He explained what it was made from, how
he made it and what he used it for. And--this is the miracle--the other kids were quiet and listened!
At first they were a bit confused, but they figured it out and got into
it. We were about 10 minutes late for lunch because the group was
so intent on 'creation station,' that I hated to make them clean
up.
These are the things that keep me working with young children:
seeing a child face a dilemma and work through it (ex: how am I
going to get this mask to fit on my face?), hearing a child help
another child feel better, feeling a child lean against my legs while
they show me a picture they just drew, listening to a child excitedly
tell me about all the animals he made up for his zoo (they all looked
the same to me, but to him they were each unique). And hearing
preschoolers ponder the importance of graduation, admit that they're
going to miss their friends but anticipate the excitement of making new
friends. Yeah, along the way they learn stuff like letters,
numbers, shapes and colors. But if I want to be remembered by
these kids, I don't want it to be because I taught them stuff like
numbers. I want it to be because I listened to them, I encouraged
them to discover themselves and the world around them, and I helped
them see more in themselves than they realized was there.
To me, that's what early childhood education is about.
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